With just 10 years to go before the world would end, it was time to stop worrying and start living, which could only mean one thing.
It was time to buy the Wii's Great Great Grandfather, the only console named after a prehistoric monster, the one and only
N.E.S.
The N.E.S was the ultimate in gaming, and kept children busy like no other machine before or since. This was largely due to the design which made it hit or miss as to whether or not a game would load, and therefore often took over an hour just to switch it on.
The N.E.S had everything. Storylines, levels, action, puzzles, passwords, cheats and, of cause,
Mario, Mega Man and Zelda.
Three of the all time greatest series in gaming history, and which owe all their success to the N.E.S.
Dave was hooked.
Saturday, May 30, 2009
1989
Game consoles had been around for a few years now, but the idea was still relatively new. In Dave's dad's opinion, they were a rather useless waste of money that children had done perfectly fine without for several million years. This was, of cause, back in the days before his addiction to technology, gadgits and giant TVs.
Dave's mum, however, saw items that could make her beloved children happy, and possibly busy, and therefore a bargain. And so it was, that Dave and family entered the new age with the state of the art...
Atari 2600.
Or at least, it was state of the art when originally released in 1977.
Sure, the graphics weren't great (or good(or OK)) and the levels were rather limited (usually one single scene), but by George it had some great games. Like a guy riding a chicken battling an army of buzzards.
Fantastic.
Dave's mum, however, saw items that could make her beloved children happy, and possibly busy, and therefore a bargain. And so it was, that Dave and family entered the new age with the state of the art...
Atari 2600.
Or at least, it was state of the art when originally released in 1977.
Sure, the graphics weren't great (or good(or OK)) and the levels were rather limited (usually one single scene), but by George it had some great games. Like a guy riding a chicken battling an army of buzzards.
Fantastic.
Sunday, May 24, 2009
1988
It was time for Dave to spread his wings. See the world. Learn about new cultures and traditions.
Yup, it was time to go to nursery.
After spending the day expanding his horrizons and colouring in, he would go home to share his knowledge of the world with his lil bro.
"No, no, no, its wight weg, weft weg, wight, weft, wight, weft, then WIGHT."
Yup, it was time to go to nursery.
After spending the day expanding his horrizons and colouring in, he would go home to share his knowledge of the world with his lil bro.
"No, no, no, its wight weg, weft weg, wight, weft, wight, weft, then WIGHT."
1987
This year was somewhat of a blank to Dave.
Perhaps it was of little real importance or interest... or perhaps it was to do with the scar he still carried on the side of his head... hard to say...
Apparently, so the story goes, he had been standing on an upturned bucket pretending to be Mumra when he got a little too carried away, fell off and required fairly immediate medical care.
But then, only Alan really saw it happen...
Perhaps it was of little real importance or interest... or perhaps it was to do with the scar he still carried on the side of his head... hard to say...
Apparently, so the story goes, he had been standing on an upturned bucket pretending to be Mumra when he got a little too carried away, fell off and required fairly immediate medical care.
But then, only Alan really saw it happen...
Friday, May 22, 2009
1986
Things were pretty sweet for Dave. He was finally getting the hang of walking and being the youngest child he was generally spoilt rotten. Unfortunately, his mum started getting fatter and hence less respondent to his requirements.
Thankfully, at the start of April, this problem corrected itself quite suddenly and his mum returned to normal overnight. Coincedently, however, another difficulty arose at exactly the same time. Dave was apparently no longer the youngest, as he now mysteriously had a younger brother, Pea.
Oh well, such trivial matters did not hold Dave's attention long, as the film he had waited for all his life was finally released. Transformers The Movie.
Dave cried like a baby when Optimus died. Pea did the same.
Perhaps they could get along after all.
Thankfully, at the start of April, this problem corrected itself quite suddenly and his mum returned to normal overnight. Coincedently, however, another difficulty arose at exactly the same time. Dave was apparently no longer the youngest, as he now mysteriously had a younger brother, Pea.
Oh well, such trivial matters did not hold Dave's attention long, as the film he had waited for all his life was finally released. Transformers The Movie.
Dave cried like a baby when Optimus died. Pea did the same.
Perhaps they could get along after all.
Thursday, May 21, 2009
1985
Rocky was beatin on russians, Marty was heading back to the future, Chunk was doing the "Truffle Shuffle", Rambo was going on about first blood again and Dave was figuring out what this walking business was all about.
Boy its harder than it looks. Left leg, right leg, left, right, left, left.. thud. Luckily Dave was alot lighter and closer to the floor back then..
Boy its harder than it looks. Left leg, right leg, left, right, left, left.. thud. Luckily Dave was alot lighter and closer to the floor back then..
25 to 25.
In 25 days the one and only David J Natsios would turn 25. The big quarter of a centuary landmark. In addition, it would likely be around that time in which Dave would finally move away from his home town of Liverpool. The end of an era, the start of a new chapter.
And so, in typical sitcom style, it was time for a recap episode. Here's how Dave got from A to B:
1984
June 15th, the child was born to a family of 2 bros (Alan, 7 and Ste, 1) and a sis (Andrea, 4), living snug in a 2-bed terrace. A firm believer of "start as you mean to go on," Dave's first year was spent mostly in bed.
Although 1984 was popular for many reasons, and even has books and films named after it, its most noticable achievement was the creation of the hit TV series "Transformers." Dave quickly became a fan.
And so, in typical sitcom style, it was time for a recap episode. Here's how Dave got from A to B:
1984
June 15th, the child was born to a family of 2 bros (Alan, 7 and Ste, 1) and a sis (Andrea, 4), living snug in a 2-bed terrace. A firm believer of "start as you mean to go on," Dave's first year was spent mostly in bed.
Although 1984 was popular for many reasons, and even has books and films named after it, its most noticable achievement was the creation of the hit TV series "Transformers." Dave quickly became a fan.
Monday, May 18, 2009
The Wolfy Ram
A new toy has hit the internet. It's called Wolfram.
It looks like a search engine, though not a very sexy one. More like one that isn't quite finished yet. But then, in fairness, thats probably because it isn't.
But then looks can be decieving, as this Ram in Wolf's clothing reveals, because it's actually not your typical search engine at all. Instead of spitting out a few million websites, it just tries to answer your question itself.
For example, search for a word like "love" and it will give u the various meanings and synonyms sych as "eff".
Search for a name like "David"and it will let you know that around 3.1 million people called David are alive today, the 5th most common name, and most of them are around 50 years old (10 years younger than the average "Jean").
Search for a date such as a birthday, "15 June 1984", and you'll be told it was a Friday, 9103 days ago, with 17 hours of daylight in Liverpool.
It's feature which will no doubt see it used most often though is it's ability to do kids maths homework. For example, type in "7x+3x^2+sin(x)cos(x)=1" and it will let you know that x = -2.4 or 0.12.
Neat.
It looks like a search engine, though not a very sexy one. More like one that isn't quite finished yet. But then, in fairness, thats probably because it isn't.
But then looks can be decieving, as this Ram in Wolf's clothing reveals, because it's actually not your typical search engine at all. Instead of spitting out a few million websites, it just tries to answer your question itself.
For example, search for a word like "love" and it will give u the various meanings and synonyms sych as "eff".
Search for a name like "David"and it will let you know that around 3.1 million people called David are alive today, the 5th most common name, and most of them are around 50 years old (10 years younger than the average "Jean").
Search for a date such as a birthday, "15 June 1984", and you'll be told it was a Friday, 9103 days ago, with 17 hours of daylight in Liverpool.
It's feature which will no doubt see it used most often though is it's ability to do kids maths homework. For example, type in "7x+3x^2+sin(x)cos(x)=1" and it will let you know that x = -2.4 or 0.12.
Neat.
Saturday, May 16, 2009
Alarming
As a general rule, a global recesion is not the best time to look for employment. Worst still, a job in a finance related area is not the best idea when its all the finance sectors fault, redudancies occur daily and "banker" has become another word for "anti-christ". But then, Dave had always liked to live dangerously... this one time he even got away with claiming 79p for a pack of Hobnobs on a University expenses form... shh... keep it quiet...
Having set his heart on an Actuarial position, the endless stream of applications began. Unfortunately, the replies were few and far between. He had thus far secured an interview with a total of 1 company down in London and that was over a month ago with no word from them since.
All Dave could do was wait... watch TV... eat ice cream... play games... and wait...
Finally the phone call came. "I have good news..." 2nd interview. Result.
And so he set off to London for round two.
The interview started off ok, they briefed him on the company layout asked him standard questions and recieved standard replies. In fact, Dave had pre-recorded all of these answers and just pressed play on his tape recorder.
Then things went a little off the norm. The fire alarm started.
"... erm... do we have to leave..?"
"...yes..."
The building was evacuated. The conversation became a little less formal...
"So, your from Liverpool, which side of the football do you support?"
"I don't really watch it much to be honest."
"Oh. You just failed the interview."
20 min later they returned to the interview room and the formalities reappeared as if by magic.
"Tell me how you would price an insurance policy against a Terrorist attack?"
'I have no idea,' thought Dave.
"...."
"...."
".... I have no idea..." said Dave.
The interview finished shortly afterwards. The guy, clearly feeling sorry for Dave having wasted his time and money getting down to London just to crash and burn offered to try and see if the company would repay the expenses. They didn't.
Still it wasn't all bad, on the train ride back to Liverpool, Dave found the following in the Virgin trains magazine:
"FREE PUZZLE. Cut out'n'keep! Month by month collect all 5,000 pieces!"
'Cool,' thought Dave, 'In 416 years I'll have the whole jigsaw puzzle!'
A week later Dave recieved another phone call:
"Good news! The next part of the jigsaw puzzle is available! Also, the company said they're going to offer you the job, they're just working out the details."
Nice.
So for anyone still trying to find a job in these troubled times, there is hope. Just remember, its not important how you answer the questions, you just need to make yourself memorable...
... by setting fire to the building.
Having set his heart on an Actuarial position, the endless stream of applications began. Unfortunately, the replies were few and far between. He had thus far secured an interview with a total of 1 company down in London and that was over a month ago with no word from them since.
All Dave could do was wait... watch TV... eat ice cream... play games... and wait...
Finally the phone call came. "I have good news..." 2nd interview. Result.
And so he set off to London for round two.
The interview started off ok, they briefed him on the company layout asked him standard questions and recieved standard replies. In fact, Dave had pre-recorded all of these answers and just pressed play on his tape recorder.
Then things went a little off the norm. The fire alarm started.
"... erm... do we have to leave..?"
"...yes..."
The building was evacuated. The conversation became a little less formal...
"So, your from Liverpool, which side of the football do you support?"
"I don't really watch it much to be honest."
"Oh. You just failed the interview."
20 min later they returned to the interview room and the formalities reappeared as if by magic.
"Tell me how you would price an insurance policy against a Terrorist attack?"
'I have no idea,' thought Dave.
"...."
"...."
".... I have no idea..." said Dave.
The interview finished shortly afterwards. The guy, clearly feeling sorry for Dave having wasted his time and money getting down to London just to crash and burn offered to try and see if the company would repay the expenses. They didn't.
Still it wasn't all bad, on the train ride back to Liverpool, Dave found the following in the Virgin trains magazine:
"FREE PUZZLE. Cut out'n'keep! Month by month collect all 5,000 pieces!"
'Cool,' thought Dave, 'In 416 years I'll have the whole jigsaw puzzle!'
A week later Dave recieved another phone call:
"Good news! The next part of the jigsaw puzzle is available! Also, the company said they're going to offer you the job, they're just working out the details."
Nice.
So for anyone still trying to find a job in these troubled times, there is hope. Just remember, its not important how you answer the questions, you just need to make yourself memorable...
... by setting fire to the building.
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